The holidays are upon us and it seems that many people have decided to simplify their holiday traditions this year. Instead of spending hours shopping and getting frustrated at the mall, they decided to spend quality time with friends and family.
In the spirit of simplicity and kindness, we’ve compiled a list of 12 simple and memorable ways to support a grieving loved one this holiday season. This list comes from suggestions submitted by our online community. So take a minute to check your vacation to do list and make sure you have added your bereaved loved ones to the list.
1. Don’t be afraid to acknowledge the loss.. One of the most important things you can do for a grieving friend is to understand that special occasions and holidays can be filled with sadness as well as joy. A message as simple as “I know that the holidays can be difficult for you. I want you to know that I am thinking of you.” It will let them know that you care.
two. Listen and let the tears flow. Allow your friend the opportunity to feel all the feelings that he is experiencing at this time of year.
3. Let the person set the pace. The duel is a bit like a roller coaster with many ups and downs. Your friend might want to cry one minute, talk about funny memories the next, and some time alone the next. He respects his needs and understands that his mood swing is not about you.
Four. Encourage your friend to talk about the person who died. If you knew the person, share your fond memories as well.
5. Invite your friend to join your Christmas gathering. As family members pass away, traditions change and a loved one may not be able to spend the holidays with their family. Including them in your family’s festivities will help ease any loneliness you may be feeling at this time of year.
6. Send a card and be sure to acknowledge the loss. Don’t be afraid to mention the person’s name or include your own personal memories of the deceased person.
7. visit the cemetery with your friend or leave flowers with a note for family at the grave site.
8. Prepare your friend’s favorite holiday treat or the deceased person’s favorite food. Every year I make my mom’s Christmas cookies to remind her of her love of the holidays.
9. Create a scrapbook of memories. Ask your friends and family to write down their memories of the loved one who has passed away and to make a scrapbook of photos and stories to give to your grieving friend.
10 Make a donation to your favorite charity in memory of the person who has passed away.
eleven Encourage them to take care of themselves. Self-care is very important to the healing process. Give the gift of pampering at a spa or put together a pampering package that includes a relaxation CD, bath salts and an aromatherapy candle. If going to a spa is not your way to relax, find an activity that brings you joy and relaxation.
12 Don’t run up the hills. Many people are afraid to be around someone who is grieving. They often treat the bereaved person as if they had a contagious disease. A true friend is one who supports his friend and allows him the space to feel all the feelings he is going through…the good and the bad.
Offering your support, understanding, and companionship during the holidays will be a precious gift. Be sure to listen to your friend’s wishes and don’t force them into activities that may be overwhelming. Be sure to offer your support only if you know that you can really move forward. And remember, it’s the simple acts of kindness given with an open heart that are remembered year after year.